Michael Phelps lies versus the truth; how to tell the difference
Michael Phelps recent DUI
“How to tell if your guy is lying!”
Michael Phelps was arrest a second time for DUI after apologizing with the sincerity of an innocent school boy with his first brush with DUI charges and a photo where he is most definitely smoking weed.
And so another sad story of cute, intelligent man who has a dark side.
Where are the men who mean what they say and say what they mean!
We all have dark sides and some of us even dare to embrace them but most, like Michael and maybe your guy, their first response is usually to deny, deny, deny like a fish under water.
Their MO: If you can’t see it, it never happened!
“It wasn’t me creepin’wit your friend.”
“It wasn’t me who lied about the bet I placed on the game.”
Blah, blah, blah!
So how do we tell when our man, or our friends and family for that matter are down right dirty face lying?
The grim truth is that research no longer supports that all of the crap you’ve been told to for like; long pauses, eyes looking down at the floor, or them picking at their clothes as signifiers is WRONG.
Looking at a person’s verbal and nonverbal cues provides only about a 54 % accuracy rate; which is about the same for guessing if they are big fat liars.
Shit! I hear ya sister!
So what can you do to figure out if your lover is under cover with another feline?
Here’s a few police techniques that with a little practice will make you as powerful as and FBI agent.
1. Ask a question that they wouldn’t expect:
You ask your honey how was his night with the boys and where he went. Then you ask where the bathroom is that club or the band – something he hadn’t thought of.
2. Let him talk and volunteer information.
If he tells you his old girlfriend was at the club, he’s probably telling the truth and hasn’t anything to hide so he brings it to the table. (Unless he’s a master mind)
3. Look for behaviors that are totally unlike the normal mannerisms.
He hasn’t gotten dressed up for work in five years, now he has a new wardrobe and is up, never a complaint and rip roaring ready to head to the office.
4. Use your intuition.
I think most women turn their backs on the truth even though they intuitively know the real deal. (The hang up phone calls; the mysterious credit card charges.)
I think ourselves deny, deny, deny because it’s just too painful. We love them or loved them. They may be an asshole now but once they were our ‘one and only.’ Or, by facing and admitting what’s happening it creates a scenario that calls for action on our part and the million dollar question:
What do I do now with the no good son of a bitch?
Remember holding on longer then you should creates passive aggressive acts of anger that makes you depressed and eventually ill; not to mention pissed off as all get out often taking it out on those we care for!
Sometimes you just have to take the bull by the horn and cut off his balls – or get an excellent attorney.
I swear, I’m not lying.
See ya soon,
April of Course
About The Author
April Kirkwood LPC holds two masters and is presently working in the mental health focussing on both women's issues as well as addiction. Her desire is to help others take the present, healing the past, and creating a wonderful tomorrow. Focus: child trauma, holistic methodology, sexual molestation and harassment.