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Why do you LOVE someone but flirt with the idea of CHEATING!

HAVE YOU EVER CHEATED?

couple-walking-together-in-park

I talk to people and often to myself about why I’ve cheated, been cheated on and have a lot of friends who have at the very least met someone who they regularly wish they will run in to and fantasize about them on a regular basis even when they are in a pretty good relationship.

Contrary to public consensus, we don’t cheat because we are over sexed, need to be loved, deprived some how in our present relationship, bored, or EVEN selfish.

We cheat because of FEAR!

  • We cheat because we are afraid to really risk giving someone ALL of our heart.
  • By cheating we keep total commitment at an arm’s length, whether we know it or not, we are keeping the door open to independence.
  • Then if we get hurt, we aren’t actually as devastated as the worse case scenario of what it would feel like to give 100 percent of our heart and have it rejected.
  • You can’t get truly rejected by someone you never give yourself to.
  • PS:  That is why so many people have affairs; to protect their hearts from pain.

Of course, we are all our own worst enemies:

We create the very experience we fear most.

And then,

we have a reason to disconnect to a fully 100 percent

committed relationship even more.

And so it continues until,

We are

COLD,

ISOLATED,

BITTER,

and ALONE!

The choice is yours:

  • Talk to your honey
  • Share your fears
  • Resist the urge to let your fear ruin the possibility of a wonderful love life that truly lasts.
  • TAKE A RISK.
  • Give it your all!

bride-groom2

Love always,

 

April of Course

April Kirkwood

April Kirkwood LPC holds two masters and is presently working in the mental health focussing on both women's issues as well as addiction. Her desire is to help others take the present, healing the past, and creating a wonderful tomorrow. Focus: child trauma, holistic methodology, sexual molestation and harassment.

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